The Business of Our Relationship Goals

I thought Valentine’s Day would be a good time to discuss “Relationship Goals” and, by way of example, how Kelly and I have developed a bit of a system of alignment and traction toward our goals.

This system isn’t exclusive to married couples – it can apply to just you or to anyone who is important in your life, relationship-wise and/or business-wise.

Over the past few years, Kelly and I have taken a few hours early in the year for a #TeamClark planning session. We set some “Aims” for the year (sometimes the term “Goals” feels a little confining and, after all, we are aiming for something), plan for some dreams, make some decisions, and just align on what is important to each of us and how to best accomplish those items together.

To prepare for these meetings, I develop an agenda (which is met with a slight eye roll!) and a list of items to come to the table with that typically include:

• financial documents
• a list of individual goals for the year
• thoughts on vacations, home improvements, charitable contributions and more.

The first time we did this meeting, I had grand aspirations that it would take at least a half-day to review and discuss big ideas, create a vision board, tediously go through our budget, and more. I seemingly forgot who I was married to as he does not crave a vision board or a year-long budget. He craves efficiency and few words (and yet he still married ME!).

Needless to say, we plowed through my half-day agenda in less than an hour.

The length of the meeting doesn’t matter. The point is that we got aligned on our Aims early in the year, which is half the battle. The final half of the battle is putting a plan together for regular touch-bases throughout the year to ensure we get as much traction toward our Aims as possible.

Our why behind doing this is simple: we want to be present and intentional in our relationship and our aspirations. Work and life will get busy, and the next thing you know a season or half a year has flown by. It’s easy to coast on autopilot (there have been years when we weren’t as intentional), but all that coasting eventually reveals lost time and missed opportunities, and if left unaddressed, it can breed regret or resentfulness. I’ve learned whether in business or in the relationships I hold dear, time and opportunity are far too precious to waste. Doing this keeps #TeamClark focused on what we agree is important, together.

This process has worked well for us, but I’m sure there are others who have a great process, too. Please comment below on what works for you. Also, if you’re interested in seeing our agenda, please comment or DM me and I’m happy to send a (redacted!) agenda your way.